You were whole and kind and trusting. And I probably should’ve warned you that I was cold and broken and lost.

Fuck you. Fuck her. Fuck love.

They all asked me how I could let myself fall in love with him. They wanted to know why, out of all the guys that I could’ve fallen for, it was him that I’d chosen. But they didn’t understand that love was never a choice.

You were a wreck; In every sense of the word. But to me, you were beautiful.

Sometimes I wondered if you even knew what you were doing to me. Did you have any idea just how badly you were fucking up my heart?

You think you’ll be okay without me? You don’t think you’ll miss me like hell? Well, all I have to say to that is: we’ll see.

And I know I’ve said I’m sorry a million times before, I’m just trying to think of anything to keep you from walking out that door.

I watched his mouth move, but I heard your words. I kissed his lips, but I tasted yours.

I wish you would just disappear.

I love you like I love the sea. And I’m okay with drowning.

If you meet someone and you think they are perfect, you better run as fast as you can in the other direction, because your soul mate is the person that pushes your buttons, pisses you off on a regular basis, and makes you face your shit.

You are not lost. You are simply somewhere you haven’t discovered yet.

You’re a fucking idiot. I cared about you so much, I would have done anything for you. I counted on you and confided in you. You were the one I turned to when the world went dark. I thought I could trust you, I ignored the voices telling me you weren’t different. You turned out to be just like all the rest. I trusted you and you used me.

Sometimes we hurt more for what might have been than for what is.

So here’s a piece of advice: let go when you’re hurting too much, give up when love isn’t enough, and move on when things aren’t like before. Because, surely there is someone out there who will love you even more.

And if I cried, would you hold me?

Heartbreak is beating me to the ground incessantly. I can do this on my own, I just don’t think I want to anymore. It just hurts. It hurts that the one person I thought I could seriously trust to always be there, isn’t.

I know just how it feels to think of the right thing to say too late.

So just live, have wonderful times and make mistakes but never second guess where you’ve been, where you are, and most of all where you’re going.

If there’s nothing ventured then I guess there’s nothing gained. If it’s not worth the pleasure then it won’t be worth the pain.

Let’s face it, you did steal me. But you saved my life too. And somewhere in the middle, you showed me a place so different and beautiful, I can never get it out of my mind. And I can’t get you out of there either.

“I really hate that. How you can’t make someone love you.”

So here I am, three years later and he’s thirty feet away from me. I could say hello, but I don’t want to disturb the memory.

We are waiting for something, always waiting.


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