All I wanna do is smile, laugh and be worry free. Don’t make that hard for me please.

I just want to really get over the fact that not every guy is going to screw me over like he did. I don’t want to have my guard to be up so much, and not trust anyone just because I’m afraid of it happening again. I’m afraid of heartbreak. And fuck him for making me be scared, scared to death to let someone else back in.

And the problem was I was never really over you. I just convinced myself I was.

If you really wanna help me, don’t break me down like he did. Yeah, I know. You’re a nice guy, but so was he. And yeah, I know. You’re different. But that’s what I thought about him.

Something always brings me back to you. It never takes too long. No matter what I say or do I’ll still feel you here til the moment I’m gone. Set me free, leave me be. I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity. Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.

It hurts like hell, doesn’t it? Knowing that even at my worst, I’m still better than you.

As a person, I was pretty lost. But in the past couple of years, I’ve been forced to grow up. I stopped letting boys define me, and started to believe in myself, and in my potential. And somewhere along the way, that lost little party girl finally grew up.

I revealed too much too soon. Shame on me for being emotionally slutty.

You keep telling me to be glad for what we had while we had it. That the brightest flame burns quickest. Which means you saw us as a candle. And I saw us as the sun.

And then my heart was broken by a guy that I never even dated.

Remember that everyone has a story behind them. Everyone has something that changed them one way or another.

Even though I now see what a jerk you turned out to be, I still find myself picturing the good part about you. And that’s what makes me miss you the most.

Yes, I miss you. Yes, I miss how it used to be. But life is too short to dwell on what happened. Each minute is another chance to be happy. So I’m gonna live my life every minute of every day. And hey, if you don’t wanna be in it, then I’m not spending time to make room for you. I’m moving on.

You only hate him because you don’t have him. Because hating him is easier than admitting he hurt you, that he got away, and that you’d do anything not to hurt.

That’s one of the remarkable things about life…it’s never so bad that it can’t get worse.

I just want to run. I want to disappear. I want to be someone else. I want to cry. I want to sleep. I want to give up. I want you back. I want to tell you you’re an ass. I want to punch you in the face. I want to be happy. I want to let you go. I want to tell you I love you and not cry. I want to tell you I miss you so much. I want to stop crying. I want to stop being sad. I want to tell you what’s on my mind. I want to be able to live without you. I want to live with you.

It may have been in bits and pieces, but I gave you the best of me.

I know her well enough to understand that when she pushed you away, it was her way of making sure she didn’t get shoved first.

When you are a little girl, you believe in fairy tales. You say you’re going to find Prince Charming and he will be all that you want him to be. In fairy tales the bad guy is quite easy to spot. He wears a black cape. Then you grow up and find out that Prince Charming isn’t easy to find. The bad guy isn’t wearing a black cape. He’s really cute and he makes you laugh.

Just kiss me one last time so then I can remember how it felt when the world made sense.

It’s only right that you should play the way you feel it. But listen carefully to the sound of your loneliness. Like a heartbeat, it drives you mad. In the stillness of remembering what you had and what you lost.

Everyday people look at me and see someone strong, but say his name to me and you’ll find that strength is just an illusion.

All I’ve ever learned from love, was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you.

You’re not mine to lose, but I still feel like I’m losing you.

I’m not even going to get mad anymore. I’m just going to expect the lowest of the people I thought the highest of.

I believe we write our own stories, and each time we think we know the end- we don’t. Perhaps luck exists somewhere between the world of planning, the world of chance, and in peace that comes from knowing that you just can’t know it all. You know, life’s funny that way. Once you let go of the wheel, you might end up right where you belong.

I knew things wouldn’t work out, because they never really do.

I know it’s bizarre that I don’t gush on and on about someone who means so much to me. But that’s exactly why I won’t. When you say too much about anything important, it always ends up sounding more trivial than it is.

And then I remembered how they all told me never to trust you.


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