There are times when I think about all the things I did that put us in this position, but as I sit here and reminisce about the past, I’ve come to realize that nothing is my fault. I’ve bent over backwards to make you happy and instead of appreciating the things I do, you always reminded me that it was never good enough. I can’t sit here and blame myself about something that I haven’t even done. I guess what I’m trying to say is, it’s time for me to understand that it’s never been me, it was you. It’s always been you.

I felt something catch in my throat, a sudden surge of sadness that caught me unaware. It almost managed to take my breath away. That was the thing; you never got used to it. You never got used to the idea of someone being gone. Just when you think it’s okay, and you think you’ve accepted it, someone points it out to you, and it hits you all over again, and it’s just as shocking as the first time.

The sad thing is we’re never happy with what we’ve got. We’re silly, selfish and naive always believing that things could be so much better when really, this is the best it’ll get. It’s no wonder why love never lasts. It’s because we’re always taking it up that notch and expecting something magnificent. Perfect. Well let me tell you something – there’s no such thing as perfection.

I think it happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. And so you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on

Sometimes I feel like it’s what I was put on this Earth to do, and one lifetime will never be enough.

There are things we easily forget. People we think are easily replaceable. Relationships we throw away because we think it’s not worth our time and effort. Then there are those that we can’t let go at all, no matter how bad the memories were. We hang on to them because when all is said and done, when people finally left and relationships weaken, memories are all we would ever have.

I have so many things I want to tell you, but I need to keep reminding myself that it’s not the same anymore. That it’s not right for me to want you to be here for me 24/7 like last time. That I cannot keep burdening you with all my problems even though you’re still as nice to listen to my rants and comfort me. That basically we are not who we were back then. We’re not even “we” now. It’s just you and I. And I need to learn how to let you go, to live your own life and stop thinking of you.

When you do finally get what you want, the problem is there’s always someone that’s trying to take it away. And all that wanting makes us blind to the fact that things aren’t exactly what we think they are. Maybe it’s better sometimes to just get what you need.

I said I’d wait for you, but you never thought I did.

Nothing was perfect, but everything was real.

The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.

We cling to music, to poems, to quotes, to writing, to art because we desperately do not want to be alone. We want to know we aren’t going crazy and someone else out there knows exactly how you’re feeling. We want someone to explain the things we can’t.

She’s not like that now. She knows better. She knows now that people lie and promises can be broken as quick as they are made. She understands that she might never be loved and too quickly, good things fly in front of your eyes before you can reach out and grab them. She knows that you can’t change or help time, so every now and then, it’ll just run out. There isn’t a place for everyone in the world, so if you’re standing alone for a while, that’s why. Not everything in life comes easy, but when you work the hardest, that’s when it’s your best. You can’t always expect people to care and even when your best friends stab you in the front, don’t think for a minute they didn’t already aim for your back. They missed for a reason. She has found out too soon, that in the end, you are your own best friend. Everyone will be broken at some point in their life, and more often then not. It’s going to hurt like hell, but you can’t stop it. You can’t change your own fate. Some things are meant to be and all the pain you go through will end up resulting in something huge. You don’t know what it is and when it happens, it’ll hit you like a ton of bricks. At some point, when you have experienced everything you can, the words “life” and “risk” won’t mean anything to you anymore. But don’t try and change that. Stuff like that is meant to happen. Over time, certain things no longer have an affect on you, and that happens cause that’s the way it’s supposed to be. But you’ll learn all that later in life when little things like a sunrise or a spring rain start to matter.

im captivated by you baby;
like a  f i r e w o r k  s h o w

Funny how a photograph can take you
back in time to places and embraces
that you thought you left behind

 I Wonder What
goes through your mind when you hear my name.

I just want to pretend it never happened.

In this weird twisted way, I know you miss me liking you, not because I want to believe it’s true, but because you’ll never find a girl that can put up with you like I did; you’ll never find a girl who will care as much as I did, because no one will waste all there love on someone like you, like I did.

what’s on my mind? i’m fuckin tired. i’m tired of caring for people who don’t give a shit about me. i’m tired of waiting for texts that won’t come, and thinking things will be different yet they never change. i’m tired of giving out chances, only to be let down. i’m tired of putting fourth 100% of effort and only getting 25% in return. i’m tired of broken promises, and of let downs, especially by the people who matter the most to me. i’m tired of making someone a priority, when in reality i’m just an option. i’m tired of shitty friends who are never there for me. i’m tired of assholes who only manipulate a situation from their own perspective, never even thinking about what someone else is going through. i’m tired of the same old bullshit over and over again.

One Response

  1. this is one of the epicst websites i’ve ever seen :*

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